Whenever new lovers kiss for the first time, when they link their arms and clink champagne flutes and then waltz off to bed to get lost in each other, they may be different couple by couple in a zillion ways but one thing runs like a thread through them all: they are absolutely certain that this love, this passion, this week-old intensity, will last forever. Will burn so fiery hot it will give the sun a run for its money.
At the moment of ignition, this is not a hope. It is a deeply held belief. It seems that absolutely nothing in all of the heavens and earth can detract in any way from the magnetic force field that makes it near impossible to be apart for a day, an hour, a minute. This love, this romance, appears to be one for the books. Written in stone.
And then fissures suddenly appear in what was only yesterday rock solid. They come out of left field, often for no reason, the way a summer storm suddenly washes away a perfect day at the beach. We don’t know why but the love that landed unexpectedly in our lives has begun to drift away. This is the denial stage, where we see it as just a bad mood, a off day, an aberration of some sort. But if we look up and are honest with ourselves, we see a cloud lingering over the scene that we swore was perfect and invincible just months before.
The great mysteries in all of this extraordinary human drama is where did the love come from and now, sadly, where did it go? Once we love another with volcanic intensity, can that deepest of emotions truly be distinguished? Does it die? Is it different for the other party? Did they share the same level of intensity? Do they mourn the loss or are they onto another magic carpet ride?
Of course, true love can endure for life. And it is a joy and a blessing like none other. But when the magic turns to misery–as it does for us all at some time in our lives — the art of survival is the life raft back to new love and happiness.
And I believe that art requires a single conviction, that holds true in all aspects of life:
“I believe in myself. I know not what life has in store for me but I do know
that I have the smarts and the strength to prevail regardless. No one can
bring me down. It is all just part of the ups and downs i can navigate when
the champagne is sparkling and equally when it goes flat.”